Woods blasts wife for using wrong club

After several days of silence, golfer Tiger woods has issued a statement criticisising his wife, Elin Nordegren, for choosing a Nike SQ DYMO 380 (10.5 degrees; with a Mitsubishi Diamana Whiteboard 83g shaft) to beat him following a domestic dispute.

"A golfer's wife has certain responsibilities, and Elin was remis in choosing this particular club," said Woods through a spokesperson. "Tiger feels that either the Nike SQ II 15° 3-wood with Mitsubishi Diamana Blueboard or the Nike SQ II 19° 5-Wood would have been more appropriate, and also more effective."

"Tiger hopes that Elin will overlook his understandable error in pursuing what he now refers to as 'extramarital holes in one' and agrees that if she forgives his error then he will forgive her for her poor choice of club. As a professional, Tiger is proud that has always used the corrct club in every appropriate situation with both extramarital partners and with Elin."