Bush-Cheney Center discloses terrorist plots

The Bush-Cheney Center for Fabrication of Terrorist Plots has discovered "indisputable evidence" that the recent eruptions of the Eyjafjallajokull volcano were not due to tectonic or geophysical forces but to a group of Icelandic Fundamentalists, connected "by alteration of just a few letters" to Islamic Fundamentalist groups, including al-Qaeda.

The Center has also disclosed that Icelandic Fundamentalists are installing volcanoes under major cities in the United States and plan to create "the mother of all ash clouds" by detonating them simultaneously.

"The only way to stop these terrorists," said Chester White, a spokesman for the Center, "is to rescind all civil liberties, lower taxes for individual in high tax brackets, and elect a Republican Congress. Failure to do so puts our nation in jeopardy."

Eyjafjallajokull