Google Announces 'Google Senior Search'

Google has released a Beta version of Google Senior Search, a new software service coupled with an implantable medical device that can  index a human brain, search its contents, and deliver results by direct neural stimulation.

"Google Senior Search gives seniors full and immediate access to their remaining memories, dreams, thoughts, and ideas," said Ivan Teller, product manager for Google Senior Search. "And with built-in wireless access and integration with Google Desktop and Web Search, seniors can feel as though they can remember what's on their computers and on more than a trillion web pages whenever they are within range of a compatible WiFi network"

Seniors start Google Senior Search by saying the word "Google" then speaking their query. Google Senior Search  displays new search results as each time the senior says "Googling..Googling...Googling..."  A quick forehead slap clears search results.

"Google Senior Search not only retrieves information," said Teller, "it also uploads and analyzes neural data so we can deliver targeted advertisements directly to seniors' brains. Neural data will be kept on Google servers so that seniors can retrieve memories well into senility."

"Google Senior Search will give new meaning to the term 'senior moment,'" predicted Teller. 

Click the link to see Google Senior Search in action.