Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Candidates disown political liabilities

“A man should live by his words,” said presidential hopeful Barack Obama, as he disowned both his black minister and his white grandmother. “When I said that I could no more disown Reverend Wright than I could disown my own white grandmother, I meant it” he explained. “America’s leaders must avoid sentimental attachments if those attachments stand in the way of governing.”

“I hoped someone would say that,” replied presumptive nominee John McCain, as he filed papers formally disowning President George W. Bush.

“While I still do not believe that Senator Obama is experienced, electable, or half white,” said Democratic candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton, “I am taking this opportunity to disown my husband, Bill; my entire campaign staff; my husband, Bill; the millions of voters who did not and will not vote for me; and, of course, my husband, Bill.”

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