Gore Criticizes Californians for Burning Homes

Global warming activist Al Gore has criticized Southern Californians who are accelerating the emission of green house gases and hastening global warming by burning thousands of their homes along with hundreds of thousands of acres of scrub surrounding them.

“It’s bad enough that these people ride around in their big, gas-hungry SUV’s,” said Gore, “but to add to the world’s problem by burning their homes? What exactly do they think they are doing? They must be stopped.”

“Global warming is just another ploy, a part of the Left’s long campaign try to take away our rights,” said Brewster McLeod, spokesman for the Homeowners Rights Association. “We Americans fought for the right to burn our homes, and we’re not going to give it up so a few polar bears can live the easy life.”

President Bush has declared a state of emergency in California and has ordered the Secretary of the Department of Homeland Insecurity (DHI) to fly to California to personally “light a fire under some people and get this situation handled.”

Nearly 400,000 people in the area are being been evacuated so that their homes can be burned safely.